Always in pursuit of the perfect query letter- how's this?

Demons and Angels live among us, most of the time undetected and unseen. For eighteen-year old Krystal Teigen being aware of those spiritual creatures is a common occurrence, until a dark force becomes terrifyingly tangible. 
Growing up in Normal, Illinois proves to be ironic as Krystal is anything but normal. She can't shake the ghostly feeling of someone looming around her. When her family falls on hard times, she moves with them to Lake Geneva, Wisconsin. Krystal bumps into Boyd McLaws and is reminded they were once caught kissing in the barn when they were children. Boyd seems more than eager to take up where they left off but catastrophes keep happening when they are together. Krystal realizes she is the one who has put Boyd at risk when a strange wind pushes him off a cliff during a hike. Trying to find help Krystal encounters Seth, he claims he’s her “guard” sent to help. While Boyd is laid up with a broken leg Krystal makes friends with a tattooed bad boy; hanging out with him gets her into trouble with the local police. The officers enlist her to act as an informant to gain evidence on the drugs coming into their town. She is hesitant to cooperate until she realizes her younger brother is being lured into the very group the police want her to infiltrate. When things turn deadly, Krystal learns why she matters to those beyond.

Sample from Book two -Far Far Away!

Far Far Away
Book two of Anything But Normal series

“At first I was engrossed with Norway, my ancestry land where Princess Kristina comes from. The story I’m fascinated with is when she goes to Spain to marry her prince. What a love story.” I exhaled in a day dreamers sigh. I collected myself and with more determination I declared. “Something is calling me to go there. I need to go and stand where she stood. I just have to go.”



Devil's lake hiking area where Boyd falls off the cliff

OF course I'm still editing. Why does it feel like your forever editing when writing a book? The easy part is writing the creative story you came up with. All the other stuff takes to long. "What do you mean, I have to make this perfect before I even send it to an agent." I'm paying someone to editing my book right now. That is a painful process because it's paying someone to insult you. I've really liked the suggestions so far until my editor said they didn't like my character Boyd in one scene. Which became very disheartening for me. I have become completely attached to him. It's like looking at someones baby and telling them its ugly. So I licked my wounds and made the changes to make Boyd a little less of a real man and more like a romance novel man that we all like to read about.  I heard a guy say one time, "If men acted like the way the men do in movies (or books) we'd have a restraining order against us." Which is true, we don't read for reality. We read for that great love story that defies all logic.    

Query letter ideas

Eighteen- year old Krystal Teigen must overcome the dark presence influencing her life, or she’ll forever be a prisoner to its will.  It’s too bad that as she makes steps towards a better existence it provokes mysterious forces to work against her.

Growing up in Normal, Illinois proved to be ironic as Krystal never was. She can’t shake the ghostly feeling looming around her. When her family falls on hard times, she moves with them to Lake Geneva, Wisconsin, hoping it will make a difference. Instead, the troubling impression that has tormented her throughout her life follows her.

Krystal bumps into Boyd McLaws and remembers they were once caught kissing in the barn when they were children. Boyd seems more than eager to take up where they left off. But unexplainable accidents keep happening when they are together. A drunk driver slams into their truck and is heard telling the police that something took over. Krystal realizes she is the one who has placed Boyd at risk when a strange wind pushes him off a cliff during a hike. Bewildered, she loses the trail down the mountain to get help and encounters Seth. He claims to be her guard, sent to help her. Just when Krystal is making steps in the right direction, she makes new friends that get her in trouble with the local police. The officers enlist her to act as an informant to gain evidence on the drugs that are coming into their town. She is hesitant to do this, until she realizes her younger brother is being lured into the group. The situation becomes critical as she finds herself in a life and death situation.

As the plans for evil domination reveals themselves, Krystal must come to terms with why she matters so much to those beyond this life.

Princess Kristina

When I first started writing my book I was very clear on my characters Krystal and Seth. But as I wrote other characters came forward and became main characters; like Boyd. There wouldn't even be a book if there wasn't a Boyd. Another character surfaced while I was doing research on Norway, my characters ancestory home country. When I read the story of Princess Kristina, I just loved the story but there was a lot untold. I wanted to make Princess Kristina an important storyline but it took the story a whole different way. I had to scale her back much to my disappointment. I thought maybe someday I'll write her story. She lived in 1250's in Norway and then moved to Spain in her last part of her life. I was excited to find that an author wrote her story in 2010. The only problem is that the book is in Norwegian and Spanish. I wrote the publisher to see if they had plans to get an American publisher and they said no, but if I knew someone they would be interested. Someday I would like to help it get published here. The authors name is Mia Soreide.  The story someday would be a great companionship book with mine. Or at least I hope so.

Far From Normal

Krystal has a dark secret about herself she doesn't revel to anyone. Going from "Riches-to-Rags," she moves with her family in hopes to leave her troubles behind. Instead, literally bumping into Boyd McLaws causing an added dimension of danger. Krystal is attracted to Boyd's deep blue eyes and good looks but she needs to distance herself from him to avoid harming him from something she can't explain. Under strenuous circumstances, Krystal's guardian angel appears to her. Seth claims to be more than just her guard. Krystal comes to understand that spiritual creatures walk the earth unseen. Can Seth protect her from what's to come? Krystal struggles and triumphs as she travels the road from troubled teenager to the beginnings of adulthood. Her story is about love, friendship, hatred and the complications of life.

work work work

I've been slacking on working on my book. So back to work I go. I'm at the final stages of reediting and I think as I get close to the end I don't want it to be over with. So to distract myself I've found a contest I want to enter. They want the first 10 pages of my book it's called the "Magic Moments contest." Which of course I've reedited that version a billion times. It's the moment when Krystal and Boyd meet in their adulthood for the first time. The sexy man with his dimples and great looks, falls crazy in love with Krystal and she can't figure out why. What makes us attracted so quickly and instantly is a mystery but fun to write about. So hopefully I will have an update on the contest in a month or so, but for now I will persevere and finish this book so some day it will be available for all to read.